Payne & Associates, PLLC

It's very common for divorcing couples to disagree on key aspects of a divorce. Issues often crop up around emotional topics like asset division, fault and child custody, support and visitation. You may feel like these issues can't possibly get resolved, and that a messy, court-based divorce is inevitable.

Truthfully, if you and your spouse can still communicate and are willing to try to compromise, mediation could be an alternative. Unlike divorce court, mediation empowers both spouses to have equal control over the outcome of the divorce. More importantly, it can lay the foundation for a functional and healthy co-parenting relationship after the divorce gets finalized.

How does divorce mediation work?

If you aren't familiar with divorce mediation, it could seem intimidating. In truth, it is far less intimidating than a court-based divorce! Both you and your spouse will retain your own attorneys. All of you will sit down together with a neutral third party to try to work through the outstanding issues in your divorce.

That doesn't mean discussing why you are divorcing, but the practical concerns about your divorce. You can openly talk about your desires and hopes as far as custody and asset division, as can your spouse. From there, you can work together to find a mutually agreeable compromise. This whole process can take some time, but as long as you are both willing to work together, the end result can be a more workable custody and asset division agreement.

How can divorce mediation help you for co-parenting?

Because you have no control over how the courts rule in a divorce, both you and your ex could end up very unhappy with the terms of the divorce. You may end up taking it out on one another when you inevitably interact to exchange custody of your kids. That not only makes you both hold on to the negatives of your relationship for longer than you need to, it can damage your relationship with your children.

Mediation, on the other hand, can leave you both feeling satisfied with the solutions to your divorce. It also helps you practice interacting in a respectful and calm manner. Mediation can help reset the tone of your interactions to something positive and friendly. When you both agree to the terms of custody and visitation, you won't have to feel hostile when you see one another after the fact.

Additionally, mediation sets a positive example to your children about adult dispute resolution. Your children will see you treating one another well and sharing custody in a mature manner. This can reduce some of the strain experienced by your children during and after divorces.

No Comments

Leave a comment
Comment Information

Payne & Associates, PLLC
206 North Spruce Street, Suite 1B
Winston Salem, NC 27101

Phone: 336-283-2937
Fax: 336-217-8784
Winston Salem Law Office Map